Sunday, February 28, 2010

On (my) Drama of Blogging

A view of my first blog, revised through the passage of years; the title seen here is second -to-the-the last one I gave to that blog

This weekend has been spent on cramming on the poem submissions I have set for myself. And upon rummaging through my written stuff in the past – written ones on small paper scratches, salvaged entries on my earlier blogs, among other – I could feel this sort of nostalgia (yes, I have used the word!), for essentially, each of those piece facilitated my recollection of my not-so-distant past.

But I know for certain that I am now old, as an intimate has said. Not in the most literal sense, but in the way I handle things now. It’s just that, for most of the time, I tend to act as if I am ten years younger. Hell, yeah. Many times. And what better things to have than to reread those things I’ve written ten years earlier and less?

My very first blog was born out of…yeah...strong emotions about a crash of a relation. A wholly lopsided thing. But I was able to grow out of it. But not out of blogging. It was then that I saw a period where I could almost describe myself as toooooo-romantic, making metaphors for every single event and experience. It was fun. Even had a small following. My longest running series at that time was about our math crush, well my math crush. It seemed that I was possessed by something that could only express itself on blogs made obscure by romance lines and strong feelings.

Fast forward to five years. I cannot say that I have perfected things on this blog endeavor. I cannot even say that I have improved or moved on from the romantic aspects. But I believe that, for the most part, doing this thing is therapeutic for my spirit (my belief in the term ‘spirit’ as I used it here requires a separate entry). One gets to feel that comfort in knowing that those fleeting or heavy feelings inside would have this chance of getting read. It’s not a selfish wish that one’s troubles might transfer to other people. In the end, one need not think of ‘readership’. I believe blogs start out with personal thoughts and motives. And from that, we can expand the horizon, the scope, of our world – that is, our blog-world.

(March is coming and I can only guess the current of activities that would come my way. Attack!)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

drama is isn't..i would certainly disagree..you have a gift cis..am an avid reader of your works..3